chapter nine

"Do you know what time it is?" Farleigh looked at the bedside clock in amazement.

"Do you care what time it is?" Justice stretched luxuriously.

"No serious. The cocks going to crow any minute and we never even really slept."

"So? Da cocks have been crowing in here for hours."

"Aaargh!" Farleigh grabbed a pillow and attempted to smother Justice with it. Justice wrestled him off and sat up.

"So are you throwing me out before we get discovered and Beth thinks we been sinning under her roof?"

"And you're sure we haven't been?"

"Did it feel like sin?"
"Even better."

"This hang up bout sex is all part of the roman bullshit. You see what I read in Genesis is that the sons of Adam found pleasure in the daughters of man; that is the so-called common herd, the evolved species, us who lived in the wilderness. Except Adam and Eve also got banished to the wilderness for having committed the Orignal sin."

"But do you get what you are saying? I mean Pastor Way tells us the snake was satan but you say it was Adam's penis."

"Yeah, in other words Adam n satan are one and the same. I mean, obviously. Why do you think it was called the Original sin? Before that there had been no sin at all in the whole world. Which is not to say we had never committed acts of murder or assault or even rape ? just that they were not sins. All our actions were purely the will of god no matter what we did. We were just as innocent as the lion who murders the springbok, as innocent as the gorilla who murders his new wife's baby cos it's not his own. And like the lion, gorilla etc we never did lie, cheat or steal. We did not conceive of the idea of saying something that was not true and so far as stealing is concerned ? there was no ownership, property is a purely satanic ideal.

"But then Adam's sons repeated the Original sin by fucking with the daughters of men. Remember what I said last night about why they should never have had babies. And look at the mess the world is in now."

"But what's the connection?"

"Look, Adam and Eve had been used to being virtually gods. They never got their hands, or feet, dirty. They probably never needed to take a crap. Then suddenly they were demoted and had to live as mortals. But they couldn't face the thought of having to wipe their own arses as such. I mean being a mortal meant having to toil in order to eat; to sweat and get dirty. That was intolerable to them."

"So they lorded it over the human race, and everyone had to serve them."

""Yeah. Quite literally. When they were banished from eden n told to go and live like the mortals, they refused. Instead Adam proclaimed 'I am the one god and you shall have no other god before me'. It was that very act that made him satan. And their kids grew up in this environment and considered themselves better than everyone else. I reckon the original concept of marriage was introduced to try to get Adam's sons to take on the natural culture of the girls they were screwing and take responsibility for their kids. But of course the prejudices of these blond men prevailed and through the culture of marriage the oppression of women began."

"So what was the culture of these humans? I gather they were quite evolved but were they like beasts. I mean did they just live by instinct?"

"Farleigh, are you taking sides against us?"

"Huh?"

"Before Adam brought his pretty face out into the wilderness, yeah, we were the innocents. We lived simple lives centred on survival. We had neither money nor religion and no more need of either than a wild creature. All the superstitions and so-called primitive religions came after Adam. The mere existence on earth of one so beautiful, so immortal and not needing to toil to survive is what triggered primitive superstitions.

"Before the days of the roman empire, the people of Europe were living simple tribal lives just like the pre-colonial Africans. Sure there were cultural differences between us and them but it was still a more natural lifestyle than what was born of the roman empire.

"That is why I say 'us' not 'them'. Even the Europeans were robbed of their culture by the romans."

"Why?"

"So that the descendants of Adam could continue to live lives of relaxation and not have to admit that they are no longer gods. So that they don't have to get their hands dirty. Same thing as why white people have black maids. In Europe the maids were usually white. In Europe you get the common folk and the nobility or aristocrats. They were the ones who could claim descent from Adam."

"But Adam was satan!"

"Ta-daa! The best kept secret of the western world. But let's see how they came to be romans. I reckon the sons of Adam and Eve were fair of face like their parents. When they started breeding with the local evolved species, some of their kids would have been more blond than others. But in order to keep their supremacy over the locals they needed to breed back the blond line of Adam. They must have heard that there were blond tribes living to the west of them, so leaving all the darkie kids behind, they went west. Their first stop was Greece where they made a huge impact. But the Greeks were not blond enough for them, so they travelled further west to Italy.

"Their dark cousins left behind would have been the ancestors of the founders of Islam."

"So who were the Jews?"

"They must have been the original tribe in the area. It would have been their daughters who allegedly 'seduced' Adam's sons. Do you see how deep the whole race, gender discrimination thing is?"

"And the Middle-east war."

"Exactly."

"It's too much. The whole thing is such a mess and you're making my head spin. I'm tired. Let me sleep." He pulled a pillow over his head.

"That's Beth," said Justice standing up.

"What?" mumbled Farleigh, confused.

"Beth is calling."

Farleigh sat up quickly, rubbing his eyes. "Who, me? What's the time? God it's to nine."

"Go to sleep. It's me she's calling."

"In the bathroom," Farleigh mumbled pointing in that general direction. "You can put on my bathrobe."

"Actually it's lying on the floor by the fire."

"Yeah, but there's a clean one in the bathroom. It's bigger, might cover more." He sniggered. Justice threw a pillow at him and went out to the bathroom. When he came back Anna was cleaning up the living room. Justice quickly crossed the room and closed the bedroom door. He looked at Anna and put his finger to his lips. "We never slept all night so don't wake him now."

"I'll be very quiet, I promise. Beth is looking for you."

"Tell you what," said Justice putting the tray she had just loaded into her hands. "Take this downstairs and tell Beth I'll be down as soon as I've had a bath."

* * * * * * *

"There you are Justice. Can I offer you breakfast?"

"A glass of juice, a piece of toast. Maybe some coffee after." Seeing Beth's deflated expression, Justice glanced at the side-board to see a veritable buffet breakfast that could have put Sun Hotels in the shade. 'Well' he thought, 'might as well pig out while I can.'

Aloud he said, "Mmm. On second thoughts I think I'll have some of each." Beth beamed as he took a plate and started loading it.

It was a couple of hours later and his second cup of coffee when Beth asked him his plans for the day.

"Well, it is Monday so I could go and look around town for some work."

"You only just got here Justice. At least take a few days to relax with us first. If you need cash you do have some you know." She winked at him.

"What do you mean Beth?" She stood up and retrieved an envelope from the side-board.

"I took out this thing when you were first starting high school. It was a small thing. R100 per month. All these years I never stopped it and every so often we would increase the subscription. Coincidentally, the official maturity date was the beginning of this month though you do not have to cash it all in at once. It is quite a bit. Here."

Justice read the letter and whooped. "And this is mine! Beth you are the best. Everybody should have a mum like you. Really." He jumped up and gave her his best bear hug. Sitting down again he said, "Farleigh and I were, um, talking last night. With him as a partner I could freelance far more easily, especially now with this little nest-egg. Whoo-hoo!"

"Farleigh only has a BA. He is not an engineer you know."

"I need someone to keep track of admin and logistics an all that. If we do field trips he can be chief cook and bottle-washer."

"Cook!" Beth hooted and gave her falsetto ha, ha, ha. "Please Justice I doubt he can even wash dishes. It is a miracle he can even tie his own shoes."

"Mother!" Farleigh stood in the doorway. "If it's any consolation, Justice, I can at least fry eggs and make tea. And I have washed dishes before. So there." He looked decidedly miffed but it was probably ninety percent hangover.

"When, where have you ever washed dishes?" Beth is incredulous.

"'Snone of your business."

"Aw Farleigh. This is my mum. Be nice to her. Please."

Farleigh looked at Justice in astonishment.

"I washed a huge load of dishes in a club in Paris, okay."

"What! Why? Did you run out of cash, Farleigh?"

"No, mother. I had a bet with somebody which I lost. Spectacularly."

"Oh please tell us, Farleigh," implored Justice.

"Well I was pretty drunk by then but so was everyone else so it didn't really matter. Anyway there was this really pretty, petite, dark, french girl at the bar and she looked kinda shy. So I told my friend I was going to get her to join us. He disagreed with me. 'Impossible' is what he claimed. He said I would just irritate her with my bad french. I mean really! My french is perfect. Anyway I insisted the mere fact of my being a foreigner would interest her. I think actually we were being quite loud about it and she may have heard us. I don't know. And I can't remember why it was about the dishes. Oh, Oh yes."

"Tell, tell," both Beth and Justice insisted.

"He was actually the barman and had just been complaining to me about the pile of dishes waiting for him."

"Hah! He probably owned the place and did not fancy his wife's grumbling in the morning," interjected Beth.

"Whatever. Anyway, I approached the mademoiselle and spoke to her in my best french, explaining that I was a stranger to Paris and asking if she would join me. Well I don't know what I said wrong but first she shrieked something incomprehensible at me, then she threw her drink at my shirt and then she stormed out of the club.

"My luck being what it is, the whole scene happened just as the band stopped playing and it was all eyes on me. Of course my friend, the barman, quickly made a loud announcement about our bet and a huge tub of soapy water was brought to the bar and load after load of dirty dishes was brought out. It was a lark, actually, like I was the new attraction in town. Within half an hour the place was packed, standing room only. And all these girls kept coming to help me until their boyfriends dragged them away. It was like my fifteen seconds of fame only it was more like fifteen hours."

"Did it really take that long?"

"Nah. It was over in less than two hours but it was memorable. My fingers were all wrinkly afterwards. There was this," Farleigh cleared his throat. "Well they brought lotion for my hands n all that."

By this time Beth was amazed. "Well, you certainly loosened his tongue. I don't think we've had this much conversation out of him in the last ten years."

Farleigh made a face and helped himself to coffee.

"How are you feeling this morning, actually this afternoon."

"What? Oh, okay, only just. I think I'm going back to bed. You?"

"Well I've just spent the whole morning eating; something I haven't done in years. I'm feeling so powerful now, I thought I would spend the afternoon getting Palesa's veggie garden going again. I thought you might lend me a hand." Farleigh rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on. We were a good team yesterday. Let's do it again."

"Is Palesa's fridge stocked with beers?"

"We can always get some."

"Okay but I might decide to lie down after ten minutes."

"Whatever. Let's go."

Website Built with Kopage
← Get yours now